Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The reason I haven't been around much...

I have been dealing with some pretty hard core health issues for the past 10 months or so... a bit too private in the details here, but the surgeon suspected a mass in my reproductive organs. My mother passed away from breast cancer a week after her 30th birthday ( I turned 30 this summer, so psychologically this was poignant timing) and her mother died of ovarian cancer in her 40s. I was put on a wait list for an ultrasound, and stayed there for 5 months. I called a couple of weeks back and they said that it would be 4 more months of a wait. Drs are so busy up here, and I wonder if there is some stigma with trying to fast track your patients... mine wanted me to wait and get the specialist to do it. Meanwhile I have been in pain constantly, affecting pelvic joints and pressing on nerves all through my pelvis, back and bladder. I couldn't hike much, or bike much( it hurts to sit... so that is a lot of pacing!)... and I was moody and distracted. The helplessness of waiting was turning into regular panic attacks. I have been an irritable mess. And I dropped 30 pounds without trying. I have been no fun at all really!( poor kids. they are all amped up in their behaviors and I have been in no place to deal or be patient properly)
I saw the surgeon last Friday and he got me in for a scan the next business day ( what a relief!) . I haven't heard back yet.... good news? The tech said that my intestines all looked swollen and gassy. Next stop colonoscopy!
So.... it would have felt a bit false to put up photos and stuff through that period.... not really up to it. I kind of withdraw through periods like that.